He/She Seemed Fine To Me!

One of the great mysteries of depression is confusing to the depressed person themselves. There are times when the suffering person can seemingly "pull out of it" for a period of time. This can be both confusing and frustrating to those who live with them. "If you can do it for a while, why can't you just do it all the time??" This is an understandable question.  My husband learned long time ago that while I was in the midst of depression, I was able to "put on a happy face" for a given period of time.  He also came to understand that that happy face was short lived.

It seems that in the midst of some of the stages of depression that one can be "distracted", able to "fake it", or actually feel a little better for a while. For instance, I can be having a rough time, but if my kids or grandkids come, I perk up and am even somewhat happy for a while. The truth is however, that if they were to stay for an extended period, I would not be able to keep up that facade. It is short lived and exhausting to keep up the fake smile, laugh, or even interest in anything.

To make sure I have not mislead anyone-a depressed person is not always able to do this. Sometimes the depression is so dark and so heavy that facing even one person is unbearable. In this state, no manner of  putting up a good front is even possible. One tends to "hide" during periods like this out of embarrassment
and out of not wanting to make others uncomfortable-for it is impossible to have words to say to make the depressed person feel better.

I guess the bottom line is this: You never know when you're talking to someone or meeting someone, whether they may be suffering from the horrible illness of depression. Just because they seem to be happy, doesn't mean that beneath that seemingly happy personality, there is a hurting, suffering person. Be kind, don't assume their happy face tells the whole story; and when you know a person with this illness, please don't be judgmental and think they could snap out of it if they wanted to. Does anyone think that a person WOULDN'T snap out of it if they could?